A Dad's Journey

Father of Autistic Twins Speaks Out

Article just published in Scientific American.  After you read it, you’ll still be asking what are those real reasons again, as the author seems to sidestep any hard conclusions.

The Real Reasons Autism Rates Are Up in the U.S.

A hard look at whether the rise comes from more awareness, better diagnosis—or something else

The most nagging fear for any autistic parent is what happens to your kids when you’re gone (or at least no longer able to care for them).   The shortage of adult housing has been well documented.  The nation’s appetite for taking care of the less fortunate is probably at an all time low.

I’m writing this as a wake up call to myself.  Over the next five years, I need to develop a plan, a realistic plan to take the boys through adulthood.  That starts with housing, but includes vocational work, a sense of purpose, as happy a life as they can possible have.


All I need now is a plan. housing


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Probably no other sport interests my 16 year old twin boys than basketball.

Soccer, no interest.

Baseball, OK they like to hit, but play the outfield?  They’d rather watch grass grow.

Football, they do OK, but it’s a complex game.

Basketball, on the other hand, seems to speak to them.  Put the damn ball through the net.  Yeah, we can do that.  basketball

Now, both Michael and Sean are playing basketball at school Monday & Wednesday.  They also play at a Challenger Youth Program on Saturday Mornings.  And we have a family shoot around on Sunday Mornings.

If only dad could still remember how to put the damn ball through the hoop.


The curious connection between autism and cancer

A surprising number of genes associated with autism also have links to cancer. Does that mean cancer drugs can treat autism?



Here’s a link to a YouTube clip of my son Sean listening to “Fix You” by Coldplay.  Ironicallycoldplay2, the same band and same song were featured in a viral video (this one ain’t going viral) because the dad got so emotional hearing the song in concert with his son seated next to him.

In this case, it’s just watching Sean’s reaction as the song just swirls around him and he happily finds himself enveloped.

It’s pretty cool, trust me on that one:  https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ioJE5Gdy5PQ&feature=em-upload_owner


exhausted-dad-at-computerHalloween has come and gone.  Tomorrow we’ll finally have an end to this election madness.  But a constant remains in my household; the nighttime antics of my 16 year old identical twin boys.

I have tried my level best to create a routine.  Setting up exact shower schedules, final meals, TV shut off times and off to bed regiments.  The problem is that being sent to bed doewsn’t mean going to sleep.

I have Michael who sounds like a happy banshee.  He whistles, hums, makes all the oddest sounds, bounces on his bed and basically keeps up a racket until midnight.  And yet, he is the least of my problems.

His twin, Sean doesn’t feel as compelled to stay in his room.  Like something out of “The Great Escape”, he waits and plans his escape. Sometimes it’s just to the bathroom, mostly it’s downstairs for a midnight snack, perhaps some bubble blowing (He has a MacGyver-like ability to mix solutions into producing bubbles and then Jerry-rig any household tool into his bubble wand).   Of course, he also unlocks the front door, lets the dog out to wander the neighborhood and essentially cause endless mischief until roughly 1am.

This leaves dad (keeper of the night shift) in a state of high alert until the wee hours.  I maintain an absurd hope that they will grow out of this, but it’s gotten worse as they’ve hit their teen years.

I welcome and and all suggestions.


Exhausted dad


this article pretty much sums up the fact that stereotypes pervail.


Autistic black teen got lost running a 5K — and was assaulted by a man who feared getting mugged

Here’s a feel good story for the weekend


The Accountant

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It will be interesting to see the public’s reaction to Ben Affleck’s portrayal of an autistic man in The Accountanthttps://www.bustle.com/articles/188011-the-accountant-isnt-a-true-story-but-ben-afflecks-thriller-shines-a-light-on-autism


So Far, So Good

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Both Sean and Michael have gotten off to a good start to high school.  Of course, it’s only been a couple of weeks, but Susan and I really like their teacher, Ms. Amanda.

One thing we’re particularly impressed with is her plan to develop long term measurable goals/metrics for tracking their progress.  Already, Sean is working to be reintroduced to the incredibly chaotic lunch room.  As Ms. Amanda put it, we can’t shield him from life if we expect him to find vocational work when he reaches adulthood.

And Michael is being asked to speak up more and put his hands down from over his ears.  In other words, to let the world in a bit more.

Having a good teacher is inspiring for the parent.  I found myself thinking about ways I could work with the boys over the weekend to help reinforce what Ms. Amanda is working on in school.

It does work both ways.  The boys touch so many folks lives.  it’s not the worst thing to have your “typically developing” life challenged and viewed askew.  It’s actually kind of refreshing.